Poetry Rant Time With Uncle Oscar
by DeepDarkDebt09
Summary: Poems and Rants with Oscar that'll bash, talk smack about Oc's, Authors, Flippy Fan-Girls, Haters, HTF Characters, Etc. Submit your Poem to bash on anyone in HTF Forum right now! If now Oscar will chase you down! Ch.6 Cancelled! I Think Not! is out! Enjoy and Have a wonderful day!
1. Rager

**Hey everyone and welcome to a special story about poems….not just about any poems but poems from an almighty fan favorite. Oscar! Now get ready to hear some funny poems if he does them. Oscar take it away my friend!**

"It's now story time….With Uncle Oscar" Said the narrator as it shows a book with Oscar smiling and flipping everyone off. Shows him sitting on a throne, eating cookies and being bored to see the camera coming out of nowhere.

"Oh shit! A rapist!" Oscar said to then smashes the camera as the cameraman was screaming in pain to then turn to static.

"Technical Difficulties…." The Narrator said to Show Lumpy having a wrench in his nose and holding up a screwdriver. As it then goes back to Oscar sitting at his chair and looking at the camera.

"Sorry about that folks. Get scared really easily sometimes but for right now let's read a poem for today to cheer you guys up. If you don't like my poems….you can go screw yourself and suck my balls. Anyway on we go to our poem for the day where I get to diss somebody. This person screwed me up on DJ Shifty's Bloody Vengeance! A great story I must say to read. I love everyone on the story….even you! But one person I truly hate is now Rager for killing me! He deserves to die! Now….I should be like that. That's very rude of me. Let me say it…in poem form…" Oscar said and began to say his poem

_I hate you Rager_

_You look like a baser_

_Throw your ass down an escalator_

_Shove down your throat a communicator_

_You may think it's a simulator_

_I'll be arrested for a misdemeanor_

_You'll be shove down the Ground_

_With no bound!_

_As I leave you in Hell….with the Hounds._

"And that's my small poem for today! Thank you all for listening! This is Uncle Oscar Oh and if you got any poems you want to diss on or make fun off or say to somebody go ahead and I'll post them on my info for story by me! Oscar the funky Monkey! Well that's all for now. See ya later bitches!" Oscar said and turns the TV on to watch people getting in pain and laughs for the camera's to shut off.

**Well that's all. And you heard Oscar. Send in some poems that you want for him to read. It can be scary, funny, romantic, anything to people or characters that are from the show or that writes on Fanfiction. Like a character from the show like Flippy or whatever and it can be an Oc as well like Ale, Flipleah, Flip…whatever that Flippy fan girl's bitches name…and a author that you hate which can be for example Flippy bashing hater Fanny Pak or Charmy Nutty which is her new account. But that's for examples. Not bashing those people, just giving examples. The poems can be about Oscar himself, my characters, your characters, even a hate message to me. Oscar will do the job. That's all. See ya next time.**

**DDD09**


	2. Raining Crazy Pyschos and Poems!

**I like to thank everyone for reviewing the first chapter of Poetry Time with Uncle Oscar. Now Oscar has got to read the reviews and loves them. Even Rager's! Oscar dissed you not me. I don't hate Rager. Anyway….Since we got poems Oscar will pick some and read them for others to see. Let's start with Punkangel208394!**

"Welcome to another excited chapter of Poetry Time with Uncle Oscar. Today he'll be reading two poems from authors who will talk about Flippy Fan sluts and for Halloween." The Narrator said as Oscar was looking up with a bored face and groans.

"Ok fine…but first I need to record Jersey Shore so I can rant on their retarded asses later on. So Punkangel208394! Great poem! You must be glad for people to hear your poem! Anyway I will read poems for people since it's my job. I will also make my own as well. So don't think I'm doing that. Anyway let's begin with the poem about Evil in Halloween. Lights please!" Oscar said for one of the stage lights to fall off and smash onto a worker as the one next to the dead worker laughs and catches on fire, screaming and running in circles. Oscar pissed sees the lights lowered to set in the mood with the fire crackling in the chimney. Oscar opens the book and begins to read.

_Evil's Playtime by Punkangel208394….better for 90210 Anyway *1_

_The Night is dark_

_As the children sleep_

_He creeps through the town without a peep…. (Rapist/Stalker/Wanna Be Santa) *2_

_As the kids watch him descend through the street (Probably thinking he was going to give them gifts or some crap)_

_As he claims another soul_

_They sing 10, 9 your soul is mine (Possible Freddy Kruger Theme?)_

_8, 7 fall from heaven_

'_6, 5 frozen alive_

'_4, 3 bleed for me_

_And watch out because_

_When it's 2 and 1' (Evil will give free iPod Touches to whoever reviews with a poem for Christmas!)_

_It must be done he whispers as his knife hits your heart._

_The End…._

Oscar shuts the book and looks at the camera…

"Well that scarred me for life…literally….I can rant about this poem but I'll pass it since it was awesome and was great! Now since Halloween is coming in a day and we've got a birthday coming up! Isn't it great? Now we got one more poem and it's from Kingfish224….Weird name but cool author. Anyway his Oc Dimitri wants to talk about Flippy Fan Obsessed bitches! They won't stop thinking about him like fans that won't stop...can't do that rant yet. Anyway this is the poem." Oscar said as he opens the book to read the poem.

_Flippy Fan-Girls by Dimitri & Kingfish224_

_Why oh why do you love him so much. (Because they are perverts who can't get that stick out their ass)_

_With Hugs and kisses and sex and such (I have a feeling they want to give him STD's….Maybe there's Oscar Fan Girls….)_

_But he loves Flaky too bad (Yay! FlippyXFlaky FTW!)_

_So sad. (Take that bitches!)_

_But cheer up bitches, don't be a scrooge (Yeah like Dimitri said)_

_There are other characters like Shifty, Mime, and that blue moose (You mean Lumpy the idiot who keeps mooning people?)_

_Sure Flippy is a badass! _

_Fuck off Fan girls and find someone else (Like me!)_

_The End…_

Shows Oscar shutting the book and looking at the camera with a smile.

"I loved today's poems! They brought great cheers for me! And if you got more people send them in and also tell other people to submit their poems to get chosen and read. And also something new. I'm also going to do rants on this story to make it less boring then it is. Like Shitty Shore….I'm doing a rant on it soon. So I'll do Poems and Rants. For people who don't want to do poems can submit rants about a topic that Oscar can crack on. So it can be celebrities, cartoon show, reality shows, music, authors, wars, etc. So go ahead and review! I'll see you guys next time." Oscar said and smiled at the camera which goes off.

**1: Made a reference and I wasn't cracking on you punkangel… don't think that. Never do that to my fans.**

**2: Oscar will tend to put notes in there for a distraction and for humor. Sorry if they got in the way. He'll tend to do that.**

**And yes he'll do rants. So if you want rants go ahead. But there's got to be poetry as well. He can rant all he wants. But he's got to read poetry as well. So see you guys soon before Oscar goes crazy! See ya soon**

**DDD09**


	3. What The Fuck!

**Hi everyone and welcome to another chapter of Poetry/Rant Time with Uncle Oscar! This story is now becoming popular. Oscar is starting to become really happy! Oh and guys like I said. If you can't do poems then tell Oscar who you want him to rant on. He's going to rant Jersey Shore, Justin Beiber, Flippy Fan Bitches, and One of our authors…..SANDMAN! Who I want to thank for having the balls to be the only one to send in a rant and about himself. Congrats to you. Punk angel you rock and thanks. Happy Halloween to you. Rager Happy fucking birthday to you. Hope you have a great one. Everyone else thank you for the poem submissions. Oscar will read them all no matter what to make his fans happy and have them funny. So let's start.**

**Ch.3: What the F*CK?**

"Hello everyone and welcome to another exciting chapter of Poetry/Rant Time with your favorite Host….Oscar the Funky Monkey!" The Narrator said to show Oscar sitting down on his throne and looking all bored and flipping through channels and then looks at the camera.

"My god….TV has gotten worse for the past few years. I mean look how they all changed… MTV…What the fuck happen to you fucktards? Putting this retarded drama shit that nobody cares about! Teen Mom? Ok I mean they get pregnant and all but really does anybody fucking care? It's your privacy and you should have used protection! Alright moving along… Cartoon Network can suck ass….Disney is an epic failure! Nick….doing ok...Oh and guys reality shows just tend to piss me off. Keeping up with the Khardasians? What the fuck? I don't want to keep up with these dumbfucks unless they do something stupid and get my attention. Like getting arrested or killing each other…." Oscar yelled in the camera to then catch his breath.

"Sorry I want to give a small rant preview for TV shows that are really getting on my nerves. But today we're going to read more poems sent in by our loyal fans! Send them in!" Oscar said to have somebody throw a sack of emails at Oscar which he flies off the seat where the camera turns to the side and goes into static and giving that gay rainbow signal.

"Technical Difficulties till the problems are being worked out." The Narrator said to have Pop cover Cub's eyes while somebody was being killed by Evil….Probably a Fan-girl or some bitch. Then shows back the set where the worker was thrown into a shark pit and being eaten alive. Oscar opens up a letter with a poem inside as he looks at the camera.

"Alright our first poem for the day is from TOSTRwaffles? Hey sweet name….but where's my damn waffles? I love waffles more than that psycho next door who loves pancakes!" Oscar said to have the psycho popped up next to him with a goofy face expression and smiles.

"I LIKE PANCAKES!" The psycho said where Oscar pushes him to the floor.

"Yeah whatever…but anyway this is his Poem to talk about what I bitch about in the last two chapters. Except Rager…Oh wait yeah he's crack on. Anyway let's begin." Oscar said and reads the poem out loud.

_Fuck Everything by Give me my damn waffles dude (AKA TOSTRwaffles)_

_Fuck the flippy-fangirls, fuck Rager too (Yeah! Take that bitch!)_

_This isn't mw2 you asshole, I'm not responding in 3! (Where the fuck MW2 came in? That game rocks! My gamer tag is JBmustdie2010) 1*_

_Fuck Jersey Shore, it's full of gay whores! (*Does gay voice* OMG you did not just make fun of my show because I'm gay like them! Oh I'm so pissed off now!) 2*_

_Worse than Flippy fan girls, Evil will just rape you (He won't even do that! He doesn't want their squirrel aids! And yes they are real ask RWJ) 3*_

_The End_

"Well wasn't that fun huh guys?" Oscar said after reading the poem to have a troll pop out next to him and criticize the poem.

"That poem is stupid and gay! It can suck my balls! It's Fake and Gay!" The Troll said to Oscar who is annoyed. 4*

"Yeah whatever Troll anyway next is another poem but short from Lacheetara who is funny as hell and does great stories which I may appear in the next chapter of T or D! So anyway this poem is dedicated to my best pal or enemy…Ruffy! Let's ready this short poem.

_You Better Watch Out by Lacheetara_

_Blood is red,_

_Arteries are blue,_ (What the hell happened to Violets? And Arteries can't be blue…or are they?)

_Watch out Ruffy, (Or what? Pedo-Bear is going to dance Peanut Butter Jelly Time in a fucking banana suit?) 5*_

_Crayzee's coming for you (Yeah so she can rape you and do some crazy shit!)_

_The End_

"Ok so that's it for that short love poem. Ruffy will now be raped in seven days!" Oscar said with a smile on his face. 6*

"Sir we got three more letters from your fans." One of the workers said and then picks them up to hand to Oscar.

"Well ok. Oh a rant! Saving that! Sandman huh? Yeah I remembered you and your crazy ass stories which always scarred me for life. How ya been? Well I'll rant about you in two chapters. So keep reviewing. Anyway our next one is from Deadliving! Ah I remember this loony! He is another blood wrenching guy with those crazy stories! He and Sandman are like killing each other to see who's crazier and Sandman won. But they are great authors so check out their work. So anyway here's Deadliving poem about some dead girl. The following poem will gross you out. If you can't handle this and throw up or look away then you are a wuss and will be made fun of for the rest of your miserable lives. Now get ready….for hell…." Oscar said and begins to read the poem.

_The Girl who was a Ugly Ho. By Deadliving (Who's probably stalking you in your closet)_

_Once upon a time, da was this little whore (cute fairy tale…is this from ?) 7*_

_She is now dead, life nevermore (Yeah died from Aids)_

_Her skin is a carpet (can we ride her like in Aladdin?)_

_I love her disembodied head (WTF are you smoking?)_

_How dare you think that! (No How Dare You!)_

_I'M NOT FUCKED UP IN THE HEAD! (Sir you must stop smoking whatever your smoking and leave please…you're scaring me…)_

_I CAN'T FUCKING RHYME THESE STANZAS! (Big Mac?)_

_SO FUCK JERSEY AND FUCK TONY DANZA! (What does Tony Danza have to do with this?)_

_The End…?_

Oscar looks at the camera with a pale face and walks up to the chimney and throws it in to watch it burn and sits down.

"Never again will I read a poem like that….but I know you guys will keep doing that to piss me off. Anyway I got one last poem from an author here on Fanfiction whose name is Hankforthewin…. Hank…oh now I remember….Hank Hill! Hey Hank how ya been? Selling those propane's like always? Well anyway his Oc which I think his name is Longhorn. He's a bit crazy in this poem so I won't want to mess with his poem….or should I?" Oscar said as he pulls the letter out and smiles.

_Fuck You, I'm From Texas by Longhorn_

_This poem is free verse,_

_Because rhyming is for pussies (oh shit you poets got burned!)_

_Now you better stay away from me_

_Or else I'm going to fuck you up hardcore! (Right in the ass bitches!)_

_Hand me my Jim Bean (Yeah get drunk and stupid you idiot)_

_I'm sick of these assholes that can't drive, (He's being racist to all Asians, and Sexist to women damn!) 8*_

_Bitches shooting their mouth off with their cell phones, (*girls voice* Omg he did what to who? Oh that is so nasty! I know right? Stupid…BITCH! *Crashes and flies out the window*)_

_Douche bags that tax my cigarettes (Ok…if you want to get high not my problem)_

_And the dicks that don't do any of their own work (O.O somebody is on heroin)_

_I want to blast your head off with my magnum (Unless I kill you with my shotgun!)_

_The End_

Oscar looks at the camera and smiles.

"Well today is an awesome day once again! Halloween is here! Read a lot of great poems! About to be doing rants soon if people can send them in. and now I'll be waiting for some reviews soon which you'll click on the button down below! So anyway next chapter will have more poems and humor if I get reviews. So send in poems and some rant topics for me to rant in the next chapter. See you guys around. I'm Oscar and I'll see you next time." Oscar said and walks off to have the episode end.

End.

**That's all for right now. So send in your reviews and I'll continue to work on it. The Skool is still being worked on so it might be updated really late or tomorrow. See ya guys soon. Oh and now the little * things.**

**1: Not a real gamer tag….so please don't be an idiot and search it up because if you do then you deserve a cookie.**

**2: I'm not bashing gays. So I'm not tending to do that…unless for jokes but please don't take it seriously.**

**3: Yes I made a reference to a popular web series on YouTube called =3 starring Ray William Johnson. So yeah check him out since he got funny ass videos.**

**4: Another reference to =3 where Ray has an alter ego called The Troll which he says everything is Fake and Gay!**

**5: Made references to a YouTube character and scene from a funny TV show. If you can guess it right you win…something.**

**6: Made a Reference to a Horror Movie. Try to see what it is.**

**7: Ok the website aint real. If it is then I'll go on it and put that poem to scare the hell out of those kids.**

**8: Ok not here to bash Asians or be sexist to women. They can drive pretty well. Asians rule and so do women.**

**And that's all. Send in Rants and Poems and you might have a chance to be selected! So see ya and have a great Halloween.**

**DDD09**


	4. The Shit Hits The Fan

**Welcome everyone to another chapter of Poetry/Rant time with Uncle Oscar. Due to not uploading any stories in a damn long time due to my computer crashing and everything I'm now back to seek my revenge and claim more poems and Rants! So now let's continue shall we?**

**Ch.4: The Shit Hits The Fan!**

"Hello and welcome to an all new chapter of Poetry/ Rant Time with Uncle Oscar. Now it's time to begin with our loyal fan favorite. Oscar the Funky Monkey." The narrator said to have lights flash on Oscar snoring on the chair with drool coming down his face as he was dreaming. The Narrator was then annoyed by the monkey sleeping and then tries to poke him with a long stick as he twitches.

"No Mommy I want the pretty unicorn one! Give me that! If you don't I'll go ape on….your ass…." Oscar said in his sleep to then have someone come up and shake him from his sleep to wake up.

"What….Holy crap! Who the hell are you?" Oscar said to the worker who looked at him.

"I'm the donut guy….the one who gives donuts and helps out here." The Donut guy said where Oscar looks at him.

"Ok well I got some things for you. One I need you to back the hell off….you smell like if somebody died or took a big ass load on your face. And take a damn shower that's sad! And one last thing I want from you is to give me some damn doughnuts!" Oscar yelled at The Doughnut guy who cried and ran off.

"Fucking douche…..anyway time for this new episode of me reading your poems! And I'm glad to see that you guys sent in Rants as well. That's in the next chapter. Now time to read the next Poems shall we?" Oscar said as he got mail and begins to open it as he looks at the first one.

"Well this poem doesn't even look like a poem at all. It's just a letter. It's from a reliable source. It says "Dear Oscar, You are the worst character that has ever been made and I hope that you burn in hell and rot since you're indeed a piece of shit monkey that needs to die. Thank you." Well isn't that nice? I get hate mail. You know what? Fuck you haters….wait…what's this? Rager you bastard. You think that's going to stop me? Yeah you Justin Beiber loving fag. I'll take you down. Yeah you might be reading this and the next thing you know I'll come out and smash your head in. Now let's read our first damn poem. Ok the first poem is from Dead living. Ah you again. You made me sick so now I want to see what you got this time. Probably about some Disney crap or trying to take over the world with a spoon or some shit. Now let's read with me….Uncle Oscar the Best Monkey in the world….Pictures cost fifteen bucks…thank you very much." Oscar said and opens the letter up and begins to read it.

_Blood and Thex by DeadLiving _

_Blood and Thex (Ok what the fuck is Thex? Are you taking Cocaine or some shit that's making you like…..Dah hahaha…. 2+2=4! Ha Really I think you might be saying Sex.)_

_I'm Multi-racial (yeah I'm going to go Mutli-whooping your ass in a minute)_

_My name is Mudd (O.O You serious? ...Your that fucking serious? I'm a simple monkey named Oscar after the Awards and your name after dirt? Wow must feel bad for the family you lived in.)_

_But I add diversity_

_To Viennese blood (Racist Alert! Leave the Vietnam People Alone! I know they may be crazy psychos but I mean that's way behind us now! We got way more problems than that! Look at Justin Beiber! He's worse than them!)_

_The Fucking End._

"Ok I like how this poem is short and sweet and nothing against you Dead living it's just you still scar me for life. Now it's time to read our next poem which is from Mr. Waffle dude! Hey where are my damn waffles? You want me to be awesome like I am right?" Oscar said with an awesome face as people in the background shook their heads no and ran off. Oscar then takes the letter and smiles.

"Well another short poem. Guess people want me to rant my ass off on Sandman huh? Well anyway let's read this god awful poem." Oscar said as he reads the poem once again.

_Nuke Fan-girl Bitches By TOSTRwaffles_

_I've Gotta Nuke (Some Flippy-Fan Bitches!)_

_It Blows Shit Up (BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! WHAT THE FU…BOOOOOMMMMM! *Oscar Laughing evilly*) *1_

_I'm Gonna Drop It (With My big ass crap!)_

_And blow some fucker up. (Like Edward The Twilight Fag!)_

_The End_

"Well Kids now this is why Barney became a child molester." Oscar said as he smiles where the camera turns to the audience as people were surprised while kids were crying on their parents which gave Oscar Glares.

"Hey it's the truth. I find that Purple gay dinosaur a bit creepy. Don't you Fan fiction Authors?" Oscar said with a grin. *2

"Well anyway we got a poem here from Rager! Well the dickhead is back and let's see what he said in this poem about me. Wow! I love the appreciation!" Oscar said and begins to read it.

_Oscar Sucks by Ragerthewarvet (Have a feeling he'll be hated real soon)_

_I Am Afraid! (Oh hell yeah you are Rager and Disco….)_

_I am afraid to lose some weight! (Damn Disco that's true keep gaining pounds and you'll be like your mom! What just saying….maybe he'll look like a hairy Jabba the Hut.) *3_

_Everybody! (Everybody!) Likes to call me gay (likes to call me gay) (Oh that's so true. You both are so good together)_

_09 called me a faggot, and its true (Oh hell no! You're going down! Let's kill this bitch off! Bring me my guns and hunting dogs!)_

_Oscar Come here, so I can rape you (Dude you are the sickest motherfucker ever! If you even rape me I'll make sure you won't live without any nuts)_

_I'll shove my dick right, up your ass (Pedophile alert! We have an alert of this man trying to rape monkeys! We must kill him!)_

_Then I'll hump you in the ass (*Vomits on the ground* This dude is worse than DeadLiving!)_

_So damn Fast! (*Goes up to a computer and searches Rager up to see he's online as Oscar goes inside the computer and comes out of Rager and punches him in the face and grabs the keyboard and smashes it on his face, knocking him out.*)_

_The End_

"Well then I guess were done with this messed up poem and also today. So the next poems by punkangel and demonizedangel will be talk about after our first rant on Sandman and Twilight and Jersey Shore! So send in more rants and poems so we can work this out! Anyway see you guys soon in my most next chapter of me pissing people off and bring happiness to your hearts." Oscar said and gets up and throws a book at a crew member and walks off.

"Ugh! This is horrible! I look messed up in this chapter! And where the hell is my damn doughnut!" Oscar yelled as the camera goes off making it end.

**Well guys that's it for now. So send in more rants and poems so Oscar can have fun and continued on. Thanks for the reviews and sorry for taking long but I'm back! So continued on my friends as I'll see you all next time!**

**Side Notes**

***1: Yes you guys remember that infamous soundboard of WTF boom? Yes I had to use it since it'll be great.**

***2: Yes Oscar broke the fourth wall since he loves you guys so much….well except Rager but he's probably joking.**

**And that's it for now and Sandman get ready cause your next.**

**DDD09**


	5. Enter The Sandbox

**Well Guys it's now Time for the next installment of Poetry/Rant Time with Uncle Oscar. I know it's been a while but hey who the hell cares. Oscar is now here after my last update to give you all his love….or whatever he calls it. Now it's time to rant on The Sandman who's mostly well known on here on Fan fiction. Time to start the Show folks...**

**Ch.5 Enter the Sandbox**

*_Plays classical music where the show lights turn on to dim and directs to a light brown monkey, sitting on his comfy chair, smoking on his pipe and looking at his magazine with girl monkeys on it as he I drooling to then have the record scratch and he looks up.*_

Uh….I was….um hypnotize yeah! Hypnotize by my workers to this. I'll never do this since I'm an angel! I'm innocent I tell you!" Oscar said while hiding the magazine behind his back and sweat streaming down his head in embarrassment to National TV. The Camera crew and other workers were mumbling under their breaths as they were tired of being picked on by the funky monkey. Oscar then made a frown and threw the magazine.

"Alright you caught me. So now let's begin my first ever Rant here so I can go along with my poems for the rest of the fans left me over those years or months I wasn't here." Oscar said and pointed to stacks of poems and letters piled up on one another as someone was crushed under it and twitching in the process and screaming where no one paid attention. Oscar was in his bored expression and slowly got up from his chair and sat down on another seat and drank some beer and burped before turning to the computer.

"Ugh….can't believe I got to do this person….you serious?" Oscar said as he typed in the name and then clicking noises were made and the camera then zoom to the computer to show Oscar on YouTube to see a Brown Mouse with a black jacket looking up and started singing.

_You know you love me_

_I know you care_

_Just Shout Whatever_

Oscar paused the video and turns to the camera.

"That is the most stupid piece of motherfucking shit video I ever seen! I seen worse…like that Rebecca Black whore…but whatever…"Oscar said to then be interrupted by the camera crew who told him that wasn't the person he was not ranting on today. Oscar had a surprised look on his face to then be red.

"Oh….my bad… Um the person that I'm ranting on is called…." Oscar said as he stopped and pulls up a piece of paper and puts his glasses on to read the name and looks at the camera.

"Sandman78308! Well man you basically ripped off a Metallica song with your name but anyway you wanted me to rant on your sick ass since I read a couple of your stories. Well anyway it's time to talk about you. Sandman is mostly known as the man who freaks the living shit out of you as you want to kill yourself but you can't. Some of his stories are good but may tend to get way out of hand and will either make you…. Crap your pants, become blind, may be suicidal, may have Beiber fever, may be attracted to the person next to you, gone mad and kill people for fun, smack people in their faces which rules, may become king, and be in the mental asylum….wow…. that's a lot of symptoms…to be crazy by his stories…but nah. But anyway Sandman has stories that even freaked out the master of making you sick Dead living. How about a surprise like that huh? Ha! Well anyway the guy is a nice guy but is crazy in his reviews that make you laugh and shock you. Well I'm actually being nice for once…." Oscar said with a surprised look on his face to which he then grins and laughs softly.

"Wow for the first time I can't crack on Sandman….but can I? Oh Hell yeah I can! He has mostly freaked out so many people they are grossed out to review his stories. They feel as it might happen to them! People who review are surprised by his work to yell and tell him to change his ways. Even my stupid creator did it as well!" Oscar said as DDD09 got mad.

"Well let's continue with my so call crappy rant I'm doing on this sick! Sick! Sick man who is known as Sandman. Now his stories mostly have negative reviews to him of criticism against his writing and to him for what he does. Why is that? Cant people let him express what he writes about even though it makes you want to tear your eyes out of your skull and set it on fire? Everyone may bash on a character or gross people, or may not get your character right but hey it's what people do. You can't change them for what they are. If it's what they write then ok you can give them a short rant but don't take it too hard on them. They may be assholes or sick people or perverts but people are just people. I got nothing to say about Sandman and I want to give my word to you people. Now if you excuse me I'm going to hang myself, masturbate, and swing around in the air with a batman costume." Oscar said as he leaves the room and the show ends with people in the background vomiting and killing themselves.

The end for now.

**Well that's all. Sorry if I didn't explain much. It's not cool to bash the guy that hard. But I'm giving out what I'm saying. Anyway next time I'm going to go over on the next poems from the reviews and rants. Ok so submit more poems for me or rants to do on. So see you guys later.**

**DDD09**


	6. Cancelled! I Think Not!

**Hey! Hello everyone! I'm back with another story that hasn't been update for a long time as well. Oscar has been very "Patient" with another chapter of his story for some time now. I hope Oscar doesn't screw this one up. Now…on with the show!**

**Ch.6: Cancelled?! I think not!**

"Hello everybody! Welcome to Poetry Time with Uncle Oscar!" Oscar said to only then get shut up as big bolded red letters are stamped on the screen, turning the colors to black and white.

"This is now cancelled by the fan fiction story corporations, thank you for participating in this story; enjoy the many wonders of others on the Happy Tree Friend fan fiction. Good bye now" A voice said as it returns to Oscar in shock as he looks around to see his staff starting to pack up and leave.

"Wait! What do you mean cancelled?! I was just getting started on this story! I have more rants and poems to read and make jokes about them!" Oscar said to the cameras and his crew which ignored him except one who stared at him.

"Dude… you're forgotten now. Nobody knows who the heck you are anymore. People will walk on by, take a peek and leave without saying anything. You're in the past now. You have been replaced by other authors and characters. It's too late Oscar…. Just pack up your things and let's go." The crew member said as he picked up his things and began to walk as Oscar grabbed his arm.

"You can't be serious! I'm stilled remembered! Look at the audience I…. still…have…oh…" Oscar said to see rows and rows of empty seats, nobody sitting down cheering, nobody saying anything or loud noises… just… silence and sorrow. Oscar looked away and stared at the camera and took off his beret and looked at it and frowned as he put it back on and slams the exit door which everyone stops and looks at him.

"What the heck man? It's dead and gone! What more do you want from us?!" The crew said as Oscar looked at him and the others.

"I want to give one last show before we all leave, give that one glimpse of hope that someone out there will review or say something. I know people are still waiting for something to pop up and make them smile at least." Oscar said to which the crew member walked up and pushed him out the way and opened the door to see two teenagers walking pass by and looks at Oscar.

"Prove to me that you can get at least someone to remember you and I'll help." The crew member said to which Oscar nodded and ran up to the couple and jumped in front of their faces. The guy backed up with the girl as Oscar grabbed the guy by his jacket and pulled him close.

"Oh god! Please don't kill me! Here! Take my money! Just leave us alone!" The man cried as Oscar looked at him and was mad.

"Look, I don't want your money; I just want to ask you something! Do you two remember me at all? I'm that monkey who used to read poetry and give rants on people. It's really easy!" Oscar said as the two looked at him and thinked for a bit to which they nodded yes as they were scared. The girl then remembered and was a bit surprised.

"Oscar? Oscar the monkey right? You used to be on some story two years ago. What happened to you?" The girl said as Oscar cheered in glory as he found someone who remembered him.

"Finally! See I told you someone will remember me! Now let's get back to making that episode!" Oscar said as he drops the guy and smiles as he walks back to the door. The guy gets up and looks at her.

"How the hell did you know about him?" The guy asked as she stared at him.

"It was easy since the poster for the show was right there on the wall." The girl said as she pointed to the poster which showed Oscar's face as he held a book. The couple looked at each other and ran off. Oscar slams the door and goes back to his chair as the crew begins setting up for one last chapter.

"What the hell is going on?! I thought they cancelled your show Oscar!" a voice said which made Oscar turn to see DeepDarkDebt09 walks out the shadows and holds a phone which he shows to Oscar. "Dude it's done. Why are you still here?"

"People still remember me. I'm not going to give up like you did two years ago. I'm going to keep going till at least someone still remembers me." Oscar said as Deep grabs his shoulders and slaps him.

"Look, I'm sorry you're forgotten and that I've not written in so long but we have to move on. I have other things to do then this." Deep says as Oscar stares at him.

"No… Keep trying, people are still reading this. Review or not, be happy someone is still reading this. Now… let's get the mail and read what poetry we should do for this chapter." Oscar said as Deep was about to reject the order to have Oscar place his hand over his mouth.

"Look… I'm just a character who was made from you to make people laugh and smile at your attempted humor and crappy jokes. Now how about you shut up and give me a chance to at least try. You can go backstage and have your alone time but I… want to do this. Now get me that mail now. Thank you." Oscar said as Deep shuts up and gets the mail for him. Oscar calms himself down and gets prepared as he sits down on his chair, lit up the fireplace, places his pipe in his mouth, fixes his ascot, and smiles as he opens his book and gets the letters.

"Hello everyone… I'm sorry for the rude interruption we had… I'm Uncle Oscar, but call me Oscar. Today… I'm going to read you some poems and talk about them with my somewhat comedy jokes that my creator made. If you'll excuse me, I'll open my first letter which is from RedEyeWarrior… sick name I would say. It's a letter about Pop which is made to bash him! Oh goody good! That man needs some help with all those child murders or "accidents" he calls them. Now lets read this in a form of a rap as you people do." Oscar says as he picks up a microphone and spits out beats and wears some gangsta clothing and rocks out to the beat.

_Uh huh…. Uh huh yeah…. That's about it…_

_Pop! (What!)_

_Pop off ta hell!_

_I knew ya well!_

_But as a dad_

_You are bad! (Nu-huh!)_

_You kill Cub to much (No I don't)_

_With his deaths involve such (*Pulls out a long list of deaths as it hits Pop's feet*)_

_Sliced!_

_Diced!_

_Gashed!_

_Bashed!_

_Smashed!_

_Crashed!_

_You're a low life piece of trash! (*Pops backs away*)_

_With all the pain he has received_

_How the hell he was conceived?! (*Oscar steps up and looks at Pops*)_

_A man came and had fun with your wife_

_When you found out that she became pregnant with that man she gave birth and ended that ended her life (*Pops is shocked*)_

_Was it Prostitution?_

_Was it Adoption?_

_Was it Surrogacy?_

_Out of all these which are the one that fits the most?!_

_The first one as it did as he came from a different Host!_

'_Cause nobody would_

_In their right mind let you_

_Become a father at all_

_Go fall of a wall. (*Kicks Pops to the wall*)_

_So you can endure the suffering_

_That you've inflicted upon your offspring!_

_Even Lumpy! (*Lumpy turns around and points to himself* "Me?" "Yeah!")_

_Would be a better father than you!_

_If Child Services came and took Cub away_

_I'll watch you cry as you did this as this was your fault for the price you had to pay… (*drops the microphone and walks away as Pop falls to his knees and cries*)_

"Well that's a wrap on the first poem everyone! I hoped you liked it. And thank you Red Warrior, it'll be a great single once it comes out in stores. Now for our next poem is from none other than Sandman! Holy crap! I thought you were dead?! Now his poem is called… The Gay little Oscar… Beautiful… I'll get my costume for this one.

_*comes out in a bathing robe and looks at everyone and talks like a girl*_

_There once was a gay man_

_Who wanted a pink tan (*disrobes and wears a pink suit that covers his body*)_

_His mother was a Jew_

_His father was A Hebrew (*looks at the camera* "Entering racist zone aren't ya? What's next? Heil Hitler?")_

_He was a gay little cunt ("Not nice for the little kids to hear Mr. Sandman")_

_He liked to lick up man gunk ("Weird fantasies you seem to have my weird friend")_

_But for important most of all_

_Oscar was a gay faggot_

_All in all ("Best rhyming! Where did you get it from? Lil Wayne?! Hahahaha!" *Starts clapping and begins dancing to the Harlem shake with other crew members*)_

Oscar finishes the dance and takes the suit off and looks at the camera. He smiles and winks at it and pulls out another letter.

"Thank you for your love letter Sandman. It was beautiful and touching. Now for our next poem which is from I'm a guest, Deal with It. Lovely name by the way, it's another poem dedicated to the crazy nut… Nutty." Oscar said and smiled.

_Ode to Nutty_

_This Poem doesn't rhyme_

_But I don't give a crap ("Starting off wonderful guest!)_

_Helen Keller can't speak_

_What's up with that?! (*A historian comes in to talk about Helen Keller as Oscar pushes him out the door*)_

_I like Nutty better than all you Idiots! ("Deal with it!")_

_Candy is better than a monkey ("Talking about moi?")_

_Or a shotgun_

_Or a man that speaks in helium_

_The things I say make no sense ("Totally")_

_Damn those Pixel sticks ("PIXEL STICKS!" They are wonderful! Pixel Sticks! They're so Magical!")_

_Fin~_

"That is the third lovely poem for today. Now we have one last poem before this all goes away… It's from Brony1Delta… Is this have to do with…" Oscar said as he looks at the camera which goes up and down. Oscar takes a deep breath and looks at the camera seriously. He raises his fist in the air and says…

"Bronies rule! Bronies United and show everyone the power of friendship and magic!" Oscar yelled with excitement and blast off in the speed of light with rainbows shooting out his ass as he flew away.

_Everyone dies (*Record scratches as it goes to silence and Oscar falls to his chair* "Well that ended quickly")_

_Others continue_

_Just leave it be_

_That's Life_

_Destruction follows_

_Just like a lost puppy_

_We can't stop it_

_Are you scared? (*Oscar looks at the camera and says nothing after that*)_

Oscar walks up to the camera and says his final good byes as everyone packs up and sends the final edits to the production to publish the final chapter. Oscar takes off his reading clothes and says nothing and throws it in the closet. He cries and leaves the building… and never looks back.

"I'm Oscar and this was a fantastic time together... me….and maybe you if you're reading this. I hope you enjoyed my jokes and my antics… I hope to see you all soon in the past… I hope this chapter did something for all of you. Take care everyone and have a wonderful day. I love you all and I'll miss you. This is Oscar once again… signing off…one last…time…" Oscar says ad the camera turns off.

The End?

**Well this may or may be the last chapter of this series but we may never know. But for now, Oscar gave his best and showed what he could do and may come back with something anew. If you want to post poems or rants he can do, go ahead and he'll read them and see what he can do to make them feel lifelike and fun. This is DeepDarkdebt09 signing out and coming back with more stories soon. Review and good bye.**

**~DDD09**


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